So today's my 27th birthday. I'm no longer in my "mid-twenties." Nowhere to go but old from here on out. I'm just kinda blah today. I just keep getting bad news on top of bad news. Even news that sounds good has a seemly underbelly.
It's been a rough couple of days. We had to go to a 7 year old's funeral on Thursday. Seven. That is waaay too young. My heart is so completely broken for his parents. He was supposed to have started 2nd grade the day he was buried. I always see headlines for stuff like this and I think, "Geez. How sad." But when it happens to someone you know, to someone who shares the same lineage and browline as your kids, it hits home with a little more force. I just sat weeping Thursday night thinking about his new school clothes. Will his mom return them or keep them as a reminder of things not to come?
It's easy to wonder where God is in all of this. It would've been so easy for God to have saved him. He had so many people praying for him. His death was caused by an amoeba. Something that seems so small and insignificant, yet left a wake of destruction in its path.
It's one of those times that questions my beliefs. I know that God is good. Everything God does is good. He works all things for good for those who believe in Him, like Davian did. So how in the world is Davian's death good? I have to believe that it somehow is good, even if I can't see the reasoning behind it right now. Because if I believe that it's not good, then I'm calling God a liar, and I know He's not. I guess this is where faith comes in.
I think these are some of the questions that we will never have an answer for this side of heaven. I think the important thing is that we turn TO him with these questions, not away from him. (which i think you are doing, btw)
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ReplyDeleteLove that last paragraph. I think we've all been there, or will get there if not. You bring it around exactly to where we find our rest: not leaning on our own understanding, but trusting in the Lord. I hope your 27th year gives you more to rejoice in than the birth day.
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